Dimaag ki batti jal gayi…(the bulb hanging over my head has lit up) with strange thoughts.
The other day I found myself going through fashion magazines & catalogues. I was looking at these fantastic clothes worn by fantastic looking & some not so great looking models and thought to myself how 10 years ago, I’d have been aspiring to be able to wear such outfits. For about 3 years of my life, through graduation years I went overboard with whatever I felt was glamorous! I was wearing high fashion or so I thought. And then came the ‘grey’ phase. I wore grey tees, grey tops… sometimes beige… but I would tell myself it’s okay. Too much colour brings attention, etc and I wasn’t seeking any at that time & I even convinced myself I was either too old or too young to wear such outfits…perhaps in the wrong country as well!
And now I find myself on the 30 threshold and I’m in another country as well… & I ask myself if I don’t wear, adorn, or do what I really want to do now then when am I going to do it???!!!! when i’m moulding happily in a corner, or when my teeth have fallen out, or maybe when my anatomy vaguely resembles anything human! So abhi nahi to kabhi nahi! It’s now or never! No point thinking I could do a particular thing tomorrow… who knows what tomorrow may bring! Live in the now & feel the power of Now…like I can feel NOW as it surges through the channels of my minds Venice!! Of course this can be dangerous to others as well… especially if I decide today that neon pink top looks super hot with green tights & purple hair with red converse sneakers!!! Oooh exciting, isn’t it! Besides I’m never going to be a size 8 or even a size 10 for that matter & neither am I going to suddenly get taller by 4 inches or so. So might as well celebrate what i have today – that’s good health, a wonderful family + extended family, the fantastic man & the insanely wonderful circle of friends. They will all have to jhelo(tolerate) all my idiosyncracies but what the heck. What’s the point if all of us are so serious… phir kaun kahega..who’s going to tell stories to their kids & grandkids about the crazy aunt/sister/friend/grand-aunt/daughter/daughter-in-law if there aren’t any samples to talk about! Hmmm maybe I can be the figment of their,meaning the future generation’s, imagination when I’ve moved to another plane.
Sigh….
😀
tampha 