Sitting down to type a few words today. It’s been a long time since words rolled out from my mind and on to paper… well not paper but on type. It feels like I’ve been through a lot since the last time I actually put my thoughts down anywhere.

There’ve been more than enough times when my thoughts couldn’t escape my mind but there was so much waiting patiently behind an almost ephemeral veil. Some emotions were hard to handle and I do wish I had written it all down so that it would’ve been out of my system in some way. Some were just random musings that deserved the light of day and some were darker than I’d have liked them to be. But I think it’s time for these thoughts to be unleashed as my head can only contain that much. Lols.

Today I don’t have a specific agenda. I could’ve written about the great panini of a pandemic we went through and how grateful I am that people whom I love so much have been spared the horrors of the virus. I can write about the year before the panini (yes I like to call it that !) when without the slightest clue about what was about to hit us was such a beautiful year filled with so many wonderful travels. I wanted to write about those too and the wonderment of having baby number 2. All of that dissolved into the panini years and despite its dreariness and the fearful times, I gained some amazing things too. I learned about Children’s Books’ illustrations and realised how much I love to interpret stories with art. I also published a book with a young author!

Coming out of the panini years of course I was hit by something unexpected and that was related to my health. I had to really grapple with the idea that I might not be able to practise or do the one thing I love the most – my art! Silent tears in quiet rooms ensued but that was overtaken by the sudden loss of my father in law. What a man he was! I miss him and though I don’t say it out loud much or share that, I know he leaves me little messages every now and then and for that I feel very blessed.

I hope to overcome the health issues so that I can spring back into action with my art. At this moment it’s a slow and painful sludge of a movement into doing art. Oh well… this too shall pass. I’m certain of it.

Meanwhile, I return quietly to the world of words to share once again all the things I enjoy sharing. I shall block out the writers block in the interim.

If you do read this, I’ll be posting every week from now on.

Hi!

If like me, you find colouring therapeutic, then I’m sure you too are looking for something new to colour ever so often. So I decided why not create some images instead of looking for one. Here’s a free downloadable image I created for some sweet colouring in time! I hope you like it 🙂

Happy colouring!

Spontaneous combustion that’s what it was when their eyes met… his soul couldn’t look away as her eyes melted into his being. Every touch welded them deeper into each other. Their love soldered into their beings and they burned like a supernova. They were meant to be. 

Time took its toll and their love burned into their souls very deeply. They wanted to be together but the longer they stayed together, the more they became afraid of turning into ash. 

They moved away slowly and as they moved away, their fires dimmed and left deep scars. Pain and sadness tore them farther away as other candles started to flame up around them flickering and rekindling reminiscent passions. 

Little did they know that they were meant to burn up and become one as they turned into ash…neither recognisable or differentiated from either…as one. 

So they smouldered away this life time looking at each other’s light from a distance and their scars stayed a reminder to how they flamed each other’s passions and loves once. 

Perhaps another life time… This isn’t their time. Their fire too intense yet not deep enough to keep each other warm. 

She walked away in sadness from him…
Years later she still never knew
If his feelings were for real?
Was his love ever true?
She looked at old photos of togetherness,
She smiled at the funny faces and familiar places.
Did this really happen?
Did he just walk away like there was nothing?
She read the lines he had written all over again.
She remembers her heart breaking seeing him from a distance with other lovers…
He didn’t see her love…
He didn’t hear the words she had spoken…
He never felt the same way she did…
He had just walked away for he loved himself a little more…
For he had waited for her a long time;
He had hoped she would see
The way he yearned for her from the start
Yet she had played with his heart…
She never saw how her teasing ways broke his heart a long time ago
So now he must walk away leaving behind
a relationship that was never really there…
and embalmed in memories of youth it had faded.
He must go on as must she.
they both loved each other but at different times…
both needed to move away so they could learn to love again.

May we all take a moment to appreciate

how delicate and how fragile life really is…

May we lay down in bed tonight

Knowing how blessed we truly are to be alive…

May we appreciate the beauty of every passing moment

for we know not if this could be our last. 

Love was ripped out from the heart of a 6 year old;

She lives in fear of everyone apart from her parents…

Will anyone really convince her that there are good people out there?

Love was erased from the bosom of a believer;

As he lays spread in little pieces over a large area…

Will you ever know if he got to the promised land?

Love  was taken away from the arms of a bride

Her groom far away fighting a fierce war…

His boxed body makes her wonder who’s war is it really?

Love was bartered from a young man 

He’s forced to tie the knot to save his family’s honour…

Will they ever know that he can’t love a woman so?

Love was burned alive from two hearts

The elders said they didn’t believe in the same God…

Didn’t these elders a while ago preach with a certain gusto

that there was God within us all? 

Where is the love? 

Where has the kindness gone?

When was killing children not wrong?

Where is the Love?

Where is good sense disappearing?

For the sake of power, now humanity is suffering.

He sat quietly watching the flames consume the lifeless body. He helped collect the ashes and bones along with few other men. 

His usual gregarious and jovial self quietened by the solemn moment in front of his eyes.

What was once filled with life, with blood rushing through its veins now being burned to ashes that’ll be offered to the river to be carried away to the mighty Bay of Bengal hopefully. 

He who has seen many deaths and brutality in his life finds the preparation of the funeral pyre most humbling. Its a reminder that we are all destined to die one day and our bodies will be laid on a pyre. Its a reminder to him that this place is where he too will be reduced to the elements. He jokes to the others to put lots of kerosene and dry wood when its his turn and they retort not to worry for the fat ones burn quickly. The thin ones take time. It makes them laugh for a while.

He knows that the men who work at the ‘burning ghat’ will linger till the fire is finally out and the body reduced to ashes. The men share a drink as they wait. Their status alleviated in his eyes as he acknowledges their importance in this ritual. The ashes will be put inside an urn and handed to the immediate family so that the ritual may be completed.

He smiles at the frivolity of the occasional ignorance of our mortality and wonders if others can see the questions in his eyes. 

He returns home to find his family waiting for him so that they can have dinner together and call it a night. He is back to his usual jovial demeanour and plays with his children.

As the evening passes, his mind still wanders to the wonders of our existence. His heart still replaying the events of the last few days. 

Overflowing from the seams

and flowing over the edges,

The cup of life fills up in the quietest moments

when nobody’s watching.

Ready to drown

ready to overtake

but never nearly getting there;

For in that fleeting moment of despair

Life will pull you right out again

and there you are at it again… filling it up again

till life is finally over with you.